Tuesday, August 29, 2006

To All Knights In Shining Armor....

To those of you thinking you might like to apply for the job of Knight in Shining Armor...

STOP! This message is for you.

First of all I have to ask you why would you even want this job? Do you realize exactly what it is you'll be doing?

You will be climbing up to the tower, and rescuing the Damsel that's in Distress. Maybe slaying the odd dragon for her too. Whatever the situation requires. All because you decided that you are her champion and that is what they do.

So when its all said and done...She gets all her problems taken care of, but what exactly do you get out of it? Is it the gratitude from the Damsel? I suppose that could be sort of nice. A little boost to the ego. However, long term I don't see that being enough to make it worth it for you. You realize too, that rescuing a Damsel in Distress is sort of like feeding a stray dog. Once you do it, you can never get rid of them. They are then your responsibility for life. YES LIFE... That's a long time to be constantly having to fix things and pulling someone else's butt out of trouble.

While I'm sure it feels all Nobel and good in the beginning....Is that really the life you want forever? You could ask yourself this.....How did she get up in that tower in need of rescuing to begin with? Could it be that her trouble was of her own making? Hmmm now there's a thought.

Lets even take that one step further..If she is up there because she screwed up and deserves to be.....Why do you want to get her down? Because when you go and rescue a Damsel in Distress the only thing your left with is a Distressed Damsel. In my way of thinking that's not a real prize worth the trouble of climbing a tower or slaying a dragon. I don't care how cute she is when she's got that needy, eye lash batting, pouty face. That stuff only takes you so far.... I say leave her butt up there..Let her find her own way down.

Maybe its time to find a girl with her feet firmly planted on the ground. One who knows what she wants and can handle her own problems for herself. One that might even be able to lend you some assistance should you ever be in need of some dragon slaying yourself. One who might be a partner when building a castle instead of another burden to carry.

Maybe its time to take off the Armor and stop trying fix things. Maybe its time to be a regular man and find a regular woman you can share your life with. One that you like as is, no modifications needed.

Castles can be fixer uppers.....The partners we choose should be no assembly required.

14 comments:

Zen Wizard said...

You're right--I want to be a knight in Kevlar vest armor and rescue women in distressed denim.

You can get knighted for really wimpy stuff nowadays, like selling a lot of records.

JgStephan said...

I think I see the message behind your post, but I'm not sure. Is that good or bad?

Jen said...

Zen wizard
I hope it works out for you. Maybe distressed denim women are lower matainance. lol


JGStephan
Yes there is always a message..You know me. Its not a bad thing.

Things are good just incase you are worried. : )

PS I need more photos of you for the photo blog.

JgStephan said...

Ok, I'm glad everything is alright.

I will send you some photos from me in the next week.

Drew said...

But see, my problem is falling off the other end to the femenist side. What's your advice for guys who are hopelessly attracted to the killers of chivalry and miniskirts?

Unknown said...

Nice post. I always thought a woman who could take care of herself would be way more appealing than someone who constantly needed tending.

Also I'm about to completely and totally reveal my utter nerdiness and say: I always liked that line in Pretty Woman when Richard Gere comes to rescue Julia Roberts and says, "What happens after the knight rescues the damsel?" and she says, "She rescues him right back."

I'm such a nerd.

exMI said...

Women have that weak spot for the broody bad boys and men have a weak spot for damsels in distress. I sometimes think it is genetic. YOU never get stuck with her forever because you're the hero and women have that thing for broody bad boys so she'll take off later....

Besides which, Dragon slaying is fun......

Jen said...

Drew
First of all from the comment... Im not sure if you are in favor of the miniskirt or not...

But the killers of chivlary are no ones friend. I have too many strong opinions about this topic to even begin to tell you here..

Its either going to have to come in the form of an email or another post. *smile*



Jef
Dear lord where do I start? Have you learned nothing since we have known each other? I feel like Ive failed you somehow. *sigh*



Megan
I agree with you. I dont see the attraction to a girl who needs constant maintenance. Or one you need to change to fit your needs.

As far as the nerdiness goes...I happen to love that part of the movie too.



exmi
Spoken just like a long term broody bad boy. lol

Your sort of right tho..we do go for the bad boy types..its something about them.

But dont put us all in the same boat..Some women like heros. I just dont need one to fight all my battles for me.

Ohhh and some of the best heros Ive ever known are still the broody bad boy types.

Have you learned nothing from watching Buffy? lol

Forzavryheid said...

As long as she isnt wearing lip gloss...

I'll save her.

Jen said...

Adrian
No Lip Gloss...But how do you feel about MCA's who talk to much..crave Reeses peanut butter cups and have a need for NT therapy?

Forzavryheid said...

JEN: I feel a lot of love, affection and most of all EMPATHY for them.

COS I'M EXACTLY THE SAME

Apart from the female part, the American part and distress part. But otherwise a perfect match!! : )

P.S: Divorce cures a lot of things- like change.

Jen said...

Hulabelly
Im so tired of high matainance Distressed Damsels its not even funny.

I get tired of seeing them ruin my friends with their needy superficial ways.

Its time we vote them all off the island.

Anonymous said...

You are way too young and inexperienced to be spouting off about such things.

Relax, chick.

Spankey said...

Anonymous, you are a clown.

Young and inexperienced does not mean naive.

Jen: "Knight syndrome" is an inherent genetic flaw in MOST men; we can't help it. Destended to be the protectors and defenders of all maidens. Distressed or not.

Chivalry is not dead, just sleeping...