I Stand Corrected.....

I had several guys read the last post about "nice guys"...And then give me feed back about the whole nice guy label. After hearing their points of view, maybe its my definition of what a nice guy is that's in error.

It doesn't seem to be that any of these men have a problem being decent guys...Most of them were raised that way. (Thank you to their Moms) They know the difference between right and wrong...They still can hear that voice in their head that makes them think about fairness and honesty. If you aren't hearing that little voice any longer..I'm referring to that thing called a conscious.

So what's the problem you ask? Well its in the perception. To a guy if your considered a nice guy by the opposite sex then you aren't appealing. They believe that women are ultimately attracted to the more bad boy type. That being labeled as nice only means you are either thought of as wimpy or delegated to friend status or even worse a doormat.

This got me thinking...Could they be right? I had to start thinking about what it is that attracts me to a guy. Its definitely not looks alone..But I fully admit that I am a normal human and that is probably the first thing I do notice. Although I will tell you in all seriousness...That I have dealt with pretty before...And trust me..Pretty is sometimes highly over rated.

So what is it that gets me hooked. Its not about them being dangerous. I know some women are very attracted to that type. That's just not me...But I do love a guy whose got a brain..If he can talk to me intelligently...That's very attractive. I love a good sense of humor. If a guy can make me laugh he is solid gold...If he can laugh at himself even better. I don't mind one being slightly cocky or sarcastic..As long as its in moderation and they don't take themselves too seriously. A little sass can be fun, especially if there is a give and take that goes with it.

But I suppose...The biggest thing isn't something you can really put your finger on...Its something about the way he carries himself...Its this quiet confidence or inner strength he gives off...Its not something he has to tell you about...It just shows....Its this firm knowledge that he may be easy going..But he wont be pushed. He wont take anyone's crap not even mine.

If that by definition makes him more of a bad boy. Because he is strong...Then I guess that I am just as guilty as my friends say I am of being attracted to it.

If I am guilty of what they say, I honestly never thought about it like that..Because to me inner strength is just part of the package...He also will...Treat me with respect. Not because he's forced to...But because he wants to. He's flirtatious without being crude...He's playful and kind..And he makes me feel beautiful because of the way he sees me as a person.

Maybe some of those reasons seem sort of self centered. But I'm trying to be honest here. Most of us want someone who value us. Someone who sees us as special to them. Sometimes isn't that the biggest attraction? Seeing ourselves through someone else's eyes?

To those nice guys out there...Hang in there..I'm not the only one who can appreciate your qualities. Who looks for those things and values them.

I just wont insult you by calling you a nice guy any more...LOL